truth.

dear santa,
i've been a good girl.
for christmas i deserve a micky yoochun.












santa thinks.











so true.
you SO deserve him.

and so micky writes me a letter.

Dear q jin,
oh my heart is bursting forth with love
other men have seen angels,
but i have seen thee,
and thou art enough.

[this geli quote is from someone called g. moore]

[side effects after reading this may include you kicking me]

[but you wouldn't, right?]

[i mean, you love me]

i think i've just fallen head over heels in love,
with you.


attached is my picture.
you can stare at it as long as you wish.
and drool.
i don't mind.
really.


kindly respond within 24 hours of receiving this letter, failing which, i shall be considering someone else to spend my christmas with.



Mr. someone,
micky




********










yesh people i've fully recovered!!
thank you for your concern=).








this will be my last post of the year.
woop!
the year has gone by oh so very quickly.
like a shooting star.





2009 is going to be an exciting year.
i’m hitting the big 2-0,
i’ll meet new people.
i’ll be forced to grow up.
i want to stay carefree.
it's a privilege i'm fortunate enough to have.




am i ready to move on for a new year?
no, not really.
i wish i could just ask someone,
am i going to be ok?
and pray that person will say
yes, yes you’ll be ok.






yes i'm going to be fine. =)











merry christmas and happy new year!!
shove your face with food, stay safe and have lots of fun!!! =D












lotsa love,
x Q Jin <3

the rant doesn't end there.

coz i don't know what did i write for my exam.




T___________T









and i'm still sick.

hot n' cold n' very grumpy.

i tried to sleep but i couldn't.
i can't sleep.
because i can’t breath.
and no this is not lyrics to a song.








My nose is runny and blocked on one side. I look and feel pathetic and I can’t sleep which makes things worse. Because I need some rest. Because I need to study for my mid-term. Oh and I sneeze like every second which makes it impossible to sleep. My only companion now is my box of tissues. I'm now blowing my nose and surrounding myself with used tissues. I'm showing early symptoms of getting a bad flu. Which means I may get fevers, sore throat and runny nose. So if you happen to see me with 一把鼻涕，一把眼泪, don't worry, I'm just sick.





Ugly and Pathetic.












I'm trying not to rant here you know.

















*trying very hard*





















*vomitting blood but still trying*




























Fine I did not enjoy this week.
(yala i know don't tell me it's only wednesday)





i almost lost my phone i almost lost my atm card i almost failed my paper i'm busy with assignments i haven't study for my midterm i can't go to kl this weekend because of this stupid business event i had sweets which tasted like toilet/detergen/mouth wash i'm feeling sick.





There you go=D.













But I had fun today=).
Despite the fact that I wasn't feeling well.
Thank you for the wonderful time.

Lalala Christmas

That way the impact will be better.
10 hours of walking,
christmas songs on repeat.
-----------------------------------





This is going to be short and erm... well just short.




because I have pictures to do the talking=).
see this is why Picasa is so cool.






Shopping during the holidays is so frustrating.
Everywhere's so crowded. Hate the squeezing.
Makes me feel so auntie. T_T







So anyway. yesterday.
TaitaiJojoPink and me.
new mp3 player,
new nail polish,
new wallet,
and a not-so-new 99 cents christmas hat,
for me =D.






We watched The Day The Earth Stood Still.
merely wanted to rest our sore feet,
and avoid the buzzy crowd.




Alien visitor.
Keanu Reeves speaks better mandarin than that chinese ah pek.

"if the earth dies, you die"
"if you die, the earth survives"
"so i think you better die to save the earth"

that's all I can recall from the movie.



okla i added the last line myself.










Yesterday was silly,
but heaps of fun.


[whoa i'm getting better and better in making conclusion ho =P]

teeth sinking into hearts.

"And by the way,

everything in life is worth writing about,

if you have the outgoing guts to do it,

and the imagination to improvise."

— Sylvia Plath

---------------

i hate watching horror movie.

because i didn't watch anything at all.

i was covering my eyes with a cushion throughout the whole movie,

and kept going "then, what happened?"

the movie wasn't very scary, I THINK.

it's the sound effects, roar.

i find horror movies such a waste of time.

like pay money just to scare yourself

and shorten your lifespan by a few hours.

=X.

my hands and legs are freezing.

i think i'm sleepy.

Lace up your shoes.

I'm back in Segamat!
8 hours of yumcha session and I'm still smiling=).


************









"eh, don't be so sampat can anot?!"
"siao char bo!"
"very funny meh?"
"stop laughing!"
"why you still laughing?!"





I've got a lot of that today.











There was once a time when we thought ‘friends forever’ was true.



Then came that time when we thought it was ridiculous. Nothing lasts forever.



I still don’t think it’s true. But 3 years after secondary school, we’re still hanging out together like we used to. The best part is, we don’t need an extravagant trip to bond or have fun.





*ring ring*
"eh come out eh!"
"wha.... now?"
"ah buh then?"
"tsk.. i just woke up eh"
"i don't care you die die also must come out"











Dear Greenapple and Ling,



I realise that all of have moved on from our primary and secondary school days. (yes we've known each other for that long) I remember how I dreaded the thought of ‘moving on’ but no one can stop changes right? No matter how we try to resist it, no matter how we fight back, change will continually happen in our life.



I’ve changed, I know I have. I don’t know in what way or how much, for better or worse. Fact is I’m different somehow from the girl you knew a year ago, from that girl you used to see almost everyday.




When I started uni, I was terrified. Afraid about making friends, afraid to go to a new place and most of all afraid that one day, hanging out with you guys would turn into a burden. I was afraid that I would find my new friends cooler and better. Now all of a sudden, I am hanging out with a group of friends other than you guys. I was afraid I would have second thoughts about our friendship. I know that sounds evil, but it's true. I know and you know that this world works in horrifying ways.





I’m glad that everything is working out good, maybe even better. =D All my fears seem stupid now. We have bonded oven closer. Reunion with old friends is always a funny thing. We would meet back at the same nostalgic place, sit in the same old spot, and start cracking the same jokes thus releasing the same annoying laughter. We all still seem like the same idiots who can talk endlessly. My tummy still aches from attempting not to laugh out loud. And I'm happy for that biji of apple cause she seems happy but don't ask me what is it about cause it's not my secret to tell=).







remember the teachers who would want to punish us must use 1 metre yellow rulers to hit us on our palms?


remember that a bowl of mihun soup costed 50 cents at the school canteen?


remember those kind of 'bookgames' where we would use buku latihan to draw and ask our friends to play?


remember that we had 'dentist' rooms where we had to have our teeth check?


remember that "Program Minum Susu"? ...... or milo I cannot remember.


remember the ghost stories that you told me just to get me to talk?


remember how frustrated you were when you asked me 5 questions and I only answered 1?












The kind of friends I have.
Makes my day.

So all we can do is make sure that those smiles and laughter do not fade into a mere memory of you and me. Let it be something we experience in the present for as long as possible.

Love,

me.

(Another) quick one and a lil' bit more.

i'm not sick, just feeling unwell.
i'm not vomiting, just vomiting blood.
------








I am so nervous about these 2 weeks. I will be so busy, with assignments and exams around the corner. I don’t know how am I gonna pull through. =(


And I know I shouldn’t be blogging BUT I am very sure I will feel better after letting it all out so shut up don’t tell me to stop wasting my time blogging cause it is not.
[Gosh I am so nervous I typed the whole sentence out without punctuations]


So hear me rant.


There are times when I feel down. It's unexplainable. Well if you want me to explain this feeling I have... It is a feeling of emptiness. There isn’t a reason to be upset, but there isn’t a reason to be happy either. Like there's nothing there. I feel disorientated.


"i don't believe in needing a reason to be happy=)”


I don’t need a reason too, but of course a ship of chocolates is a very good reason to be happy=D. Ok the ranting ends here.
-------









Did you see the moon yesterday?
Sms has been circulating around,
Zi Wei has been telling me to look upon the sky yesterday night.
Something special from the moon.
She smiled.




obviously i googled this one.
i was so excited i forgot to take picture.



So cute right?
they say it happens every 100 years.
or 1000 years.
Guess it's a gift from the moon to the world,
especially those victims in Mumbai and Thailand.
Heavy toll on human life.
Painfully saddened, appalled and outraged
by this senseless, mindless, heartless
brutal act of violence.
And you question why this happened,
and is still happening.
I'll ask why.
-----------










I didn't know I TALK IN MY SLEEP. And yesterday night was not the first time. From what I'm told by my roomie, who almost got a heart attack last night, I rarely say anything of consequence, but I speak as if I were awake and having a normal conversation. I don't shout, I don't sing, and I don't respond to people who try to talk back to me. But I was talking yesterday, LOUDLY, more like mumbling cause she couldn't catch what I said. So she decided to tell me. The truth. That I'm a sleep talker.

CONFIRMED.

What reallllly creeped her out though, was when she turned to look at me at one point,




















I WAS SMILING AT HER.


WHEN I WAS ASLEEP.


"LIKE THE JOKER GUY," Quote her.













WARAO DAMN SCARY CAN???!!!!!!!

-------------









I'm sleepy, but I'm refusing myself of sleep.
I need coffee.
I had my first one last sem during finals. (yea you heard it right)
It was horrible,
because I am hopelessly incapable of mixing anything right
(coffee powder with milk or milo powder with milk )
Haih, what to do. It was either that,
or sleep and fail the paper.
---------







erm.
ok.
bye.

A quick one.

I am sitting here in front of my laptop at this very moment staring at the screen and scratching my hand because some freaking annoying mosquito bit it (why is it on the 9th floor?) wondering what to do when I am supposed to be studying for my upcoming mid-term which starts, by the way, on the 4th December, unfortunately.


Fuyoh, one sooper dooper long sentence. geng or not?






Yerrr, it’s pretty obvious I damn wuliao now. I’m supposed to be studying. I’m suppose to be a nerd. I am a nerd, so what am I doing? I must study!

Just thought it might interest you to know I am not lazing off.


Not lazing off.


And acting like my IP notes are transparent is not lazing off.

A night out with a month (May) and a vampire (Edward).

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart



So I've watched it.
I've been excited about it for a while.
I wanted to wait but I couldn't.
There's always an exception with cute and good looking vampires yo=D.








I understand that you cannot come into a movie made from a really good book with a closed mind and too high of expectations. I didn't mind that it wasn't amazing; and it turned out not bad. I can offically say I've been dazzled=).


I liked that the film was a dark and edgy. RobPatz was dazzling!! Of course he is. The homeless look only looks good on him. He played Edward out so much. I'm not sure what it is, but this guy keeps making me LOL. I actually like Bella more in the film than in the book..she comes off as strong and humble where in the book I found her to be a bit whiny.


And for me the Bella/Edward thing was too fast. It was so weird since they hardly knew each other. The only thing they actually talked about is being a vampire. How odd is that?! AND THE KISSING SCENE WAS CENSORED!! urgh.


There was not enough of the Cullens. Jasper only had, what, one line? It was not even mentioned that he could manipulate emotions. They skipped over important and key parts but elaborated on the wrong things. And don't even get me started with Jacob and that hair! Gawd.









Overall, the movie was fun to watch. Seriously. It was more like a chick lit but loved it anyway. And also because it’s such a fairytale. I love love fairytales.=))

So go watch. In the cinema.


I would have loved it more if there weren't girls screaming the entire time, like everytime rob's face was on screen. It was obnoxious ok. I mean, he is hot but... oh wait, that was me and May.

X

First of all,
have all of you actually *gasp* abandoned me?!


ok lah, it’s only been one week since I blogged k.
no reason to ditch me so fast!






It’s official.
I need a new and louder alarm clock or a new pair of ears. Because I did not hear my alarm clock. Sleeping too much is not good for your body and mind at all. I slept for 12 hours today and I look dead now. I feel tired despite of all that sleep and yoga and I can’t concentrate when I study.







So I’m going to update today.
And the topic for today is


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I'll edit if I can think of a title.


I’m absolutely out of ideas about what to write.
Unless you wanna read about how I punched holes into papers.
Or how I painted my toenails red.
Or how I locked myself out of my room.


And second of all…
Erm, actually there is no second of all.







THE END.








*This is a random entry. Written because the blogger is amazingly bored (note: bored, not boring). Maybe she’ll get a sudden light-bulb-turns-on idea about what to write. Or maybe she'll find something interesting in her drafts. Then she'll blog. Thankyouverymuch.*

=)).

you never know how things are going to turn out.
you almost know,
but you can never be quite sure.


------


okla i've realized that i hardly talk about anything substantial anymore.
so i'll talk about something serious now k?








have you ever came across with the whatever and anything people?
or maybe you're one of those.




1. so where do you wanna eat?

2. anything lah.

1. eat at mamak want?

2. whatever lah... buttt…. mamak very hot leh.

1. so eat at mcd can?

2. actually ah anything also can la. but mcd ah.. boring lah.

1. haaah like that ah… we go eat sushi lor.

2. i said anything dy mah. up to you lor. but expensive rigghttt sushi.

1. $#@*!

2. don’t lah angry. whatever also can lah. i very cincai one.




just when you've settled down,



1. so what do you wanna eat?

2. i dunno leh. you decide for me lah.

1. you say one ah... how bout drinks?

2. aiyo.. i said anything lo.. why you so fan one!



look who's the irritating one now.
damn frustrating right.
i know.

-------







sometimes you should just use a little time to wonder
like why am i like this?
why is there no egg in the eggplant?
and also,
why is the person you secretly like called a crush?
maybe you hoped for a happy ending,
and the hope got crushed?
and, since i'm the one asking question,
what is the longest chair/kerusi/the thing you sit on?
ahaxx =D


------






today was not bad a day.
although extremely sleepy my eyes were.
i'm hooked on twilight saga all over again.=)))
the movie is coming out in malaysia!
i pray it will not disappoint.
nah this is a HUGE poster of the movie.






p/s the author is going back to segamat too-mooo-rrowwww! =D

to be really honest, i honestly tell you

you've changed.
and maybe i have too.

-----






i think.
i am emotionally unavailable.
i am emotionally inadequate.
and i'm quite fine with it.
i’m not even gonna start complaining about it here.
i want to go into hibernation soon.
yes, it'll be good.









somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me,
i ain't the sharpest tool in the shed.
she was looking kinda dumb with her finger and her thumb,
in the shape of an 'L' on her forehead.

well the years start coming and they don't stop coming,
back to the rule and i hit the ground running.
didn't make sense not to live for fun,
your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb.

so much to do so much to see,
so what's wrong with taking the back street?
you'll never know if you don't go,
you'll never shine if you don't glow

-smash mouth's allstar-



remember this one?
the days when ayer wasn't a word.







oh well,
i shall go wash my hair and talk to hammy.
i have missed my reads.
byeimissyoutakecare.
goodnight to you.
sleep for me i wish upon the star so bright.

i woke myself from sleep, a full recovery.

right now i am cleaning my table.

clearing the clutter on my desk so that i can study properly.

this is what i do,

everytime before i start my vigorous preparation for my study.

it is also a way to procrastinate.

but at least i am getting something done ok.

so today.

a new day full of different feelings.

different emotion.

something strange.

good strange or bad strange i am not too sure of.

perhaps in the middle strange.

please. anyway.

this is sunday.

smiles.=)

i think no matter how many friends that you make,

the real happiness is talking to one single person,

feeling relax,

the world of randomness,

laughing in sync,

and it is comforting.

yes we love to do the most random stuff.

our randomness never ceased to amaze me.

all the bits and pieces.

so thank you,

for that five hours that we've spent together.=)))

and of course i love my wantan.

he can make me smile and light.

he won't give me big hugs.

but he will give me teeny tiny furry snuggles.

which right now i can almost indefinitely accept.=D

can't continue dy.

back to clearing clutter.

everyday i'm a different type of mental.

Suju-T (Sungmin x Moeyan) - 明日のために、




have faith, me.
take deep breaths.
inhale.
exhale.
inhale.
exhale.
and start believing yourself.
you cannot imagine how many other people have faith in you.
so, shouldn't you start believing in yourself too?





*




terrible head pains,
and icy icy toes.
my head is having a headache of its own.
and that headache is giving me a major bad headache.
would be pretty great if i could massage the brain.
give it a good squeeze.



*



confession.
i have something to confess.
i am clumsy.
no actually the right way to put it is,
i am c.l.u.m.s.y.
only some people realised this though.
probably, you guys did
but were kind enough not to point it out,
so that i don't look clumsy.
huhu how kind of all of you.
thankyouverymuch.


*


today i amused myself.
i keep knocking into things.
i got my index finger's joint hit against something a few minutes ago,
and now it like a little swollen.
then while going out of the toilet,
my arm knocked against the basin, etc, etc, etc.






*






the sky is gloomy.
i was out,
eating ikan bakar,
it started to thunder and i saw lightning flashing.
dampened my mood, seriously.
i was monstrously tired and worn out today.
i will now get into my pyjamas.
boil the kettle for a hot water bottle.
make a cup of hot milo.
kiss you goodnight.
and fall asleep.

me. universe. you.

i finally watched my long-awaited
High School Musical - Senior Year.
i don't care if anyone disagree with me.
it's thumbs-up and all toes-up good for me.
mesmerized by that pair of dazzling blue eyes,
sweet duets and pair dancing.
another tale, that don't come true.
i want to dream and live in a musical,
and not wake up.












oh i saw this trailer in the cinema,



and i choked on my nuggets when i saw this part.
sooooooo cute the hamster ♥
i have to watch this movie =))))

i am.

the tiny bit of rest should be able to give me enough push,
for a new semester.
more work,
more work.

i came across this a while ago.
it's an interactive photo installation.
they took pictures of strangers,
who filled in the blank to describe themselves.
it's pretty amazing.







more pictures here.=)








ok.
time to bathe my hamster
and make him run a little cos he's growing fatter and fatter.
i shall take pictures of him later.
have i told you that i've decided to name him wantan ham?=D













-"never refuse an invitation,
never resist the unfamiliar,
never fail to be polite,
and never outstay the welcome.
just keep your mind open,
and suck in the experience.
and if it hurts,
you know what?
it's probably worth it.-"



hello malacca. =)

a twilighter?

vampire. werewolf. suspense. romance.



human falls madly in love with a vampire,
vampire wants to drink her blood,
but falls in love with her as well.
yum.





vampire is ♥. =)
i read the series at a feverish pace, because i wanted to find out what happened. i think reading it non-stop works greatly against my interest for the novels. by the middle of the 2nd book, i was sick of the obsessive ramblings of the bella girl. so i'm taking a break before continue reading the 3rd.


what i dislike about this series so far is the blatant promotion of the concept of "if i won't have you, i'll kill myself." yes, it's sweet to hear that they cannot live without each other. but to advocate committing suicide for love is one thing i cannot accept.


and, the never-ending of edward-swooning. i mean, seriously. how many times can we read about how edward literally makes bella swoon? i thought the too detailed descriptions of edward's beauty would end at the first book, but I was very, very wrong. sometimes i would irritably skip through those descriptions.







that said,
i spent the whole night reading the 2nd book in the series.=P
i confess to being hooked as long as you throw me a few vampires and maybe a werewolf or two. i keep turning the pages bacause i just couldn't put it down. it was like an unhealthy addiction for me. it reminds me of soaps, although it's bad, you watch it.









just for the record,
i think the best character is jacob black.
and alice cullen is becoming a favourite too.=D

非常非常。

曾经看过 翅膀上长着一对大大眼睛的蝴蝶
他们说 那是一种保护作用
其实不是真的眼睛
是要让想猎食他的动物 恐惧 害怕
达到威吓的功用。




伪眼。
其实每个人 都是希望 给人一个形象
只是当有人识破你的武裝
清楚窥见面具后面的你时
当下的你不知是如何的惊慌 无助
你不否定还沾沾自喜
坦然的笑说 我就是酱
转个头觉得自己很可悲
但是换个角度思考
生存在更像丛林的世界里
你还是需要它
來慰藉你那似有若无的安全感。


变了变了。
但真的只有一点。











我想记得=).
ok 就酱。
ah ah
next time ok
about the books.

dum dee dum.

there there.
so i went out.
bought some clothes,
a pair of shoes,
cut my hair.
for a change i thought.
i dyed my hair reddish brown,
and it came out black.




so hello new hair.
hello happy me.
being happy is a funny thing,
at least for me.
sometimes when i'm too happy,
i tend to worry about having to be unhappy later.
so, i become less extremely happy,
and just be normal happy.
that way i wouldn't worry so much about unhappiness.


yes,
i'm weird like that.





aren't we all the little social butterflies?
though after careful consideration,
it's safe to say that i should be extracted from that equation.
i've been hanging out with my parents.
but i know i'm gonna miss them soon.





i think and think and think.
what's for me to place my future on.
what is there for me.
am i really certain this is for me.
i come to a point that i need to reevaluate on my point of view.
how i go about it.
how to enjoy it.
i've found a secret motivation.
i'll story when it works ok=)





i wonder what has law taught me.
the critique,
the justice,
the argument?
holiday came and gone like it never set foot on it at all,
2nd sem of 2nd year is coming in an unbelieveable mode.
why do time flows away like this.
can it just pause for a moment to at least finish what i'm doing.
i am so not sure whether the efforts i put in,
equal to the marks that were shown.
but guess what,
life has to go on. =)






oh i'm so happy that obama won!
ok thanks bye.
i'll blog about the books i've read in the next post k=D.

life's like that.

if looks could kill,
























and



then i'm dead now.
in peace. =)






school.
is starting in 10 days.
gonna set up a new column -
new inspiration/new goals.
i think i'm someone that needs new goals to be placed inside my head constantly.



someone,
somewhere,
find me a new inspiration or motivation.
movies, episodes, dreams,
are all wonderful but they don't last.
on another note,
i should get out of my house tomorrow.
i have a habit of staying at home too much.



seriously,
these two weeks have been nothing but,
emptiness i guess.
the time sleeping has been comforting.
don't be lazy, me.



yesterday was spent rushing through season1 of lipstick jungle.
worthy watching,
for that eye candy kirk,
the hunk you saw up there. =))))





and here i am,
on a thursday afternoon all alone in the house,
behaving like an old single lady,
deciding what to do.
continue my tv,
out for a run ,
eat my heart out,
or just listening to sad sappy songs.




i think i shall eat,
run,
shower,
and start the night with my heroes season3.
buhbai. =D

i'm left handed.

late at night,
it feels almost lonely when you're the only light in the house.
quiet, serene, but distant.
ladidaaa.




first thing first.
happy belated birthday to mommy and yew!
i got mommy one of those osim thingy,
with papa's money.
oh i've bought something for yew too,
call me ar.
i really miss the girlfriend.
we keep saying that we've to meet up sometime,
but we never get to doing so.
lol,
let's just get comfortable with the grand idea of meeting up then.




i'm decaying.
watch me rot.
smell my decomposing flesh.
being bored alone is super hilarious.
because now,
i'm giving random people on friendster testimonials.
i'm even bored of sleeping.
save me.




watched some hokkien drama with mommy.
bonding session.
heheh.
a long running soap,
stretching to hundreds of episodes.
too lenghty for me.
it stretches to the third or fourth generation now.
basically it's conversation,
conversation and more conversation.
but it does have some drama.=)
and they say one of those signs of getting old is this:
you start loving hokkien dramas.
O_o




have been watching tv so much these days,
couch potato is now a far understatement.
i have morphed into a tv series junkie.
it's like you tell yourself,
"okay this is the last episode,
after this you better get off the couch!"
and then!
this last episode always end in a cliffhanger!
then you say,
"i only want to know what happens next!"
and then you sit there for another few hours,
until you take your meal then feel so sleepy after that and go to bed.




i am told that i lose interest easily.
i don't need to be told.
i already know.
i think it's my indecisive nature.




ok la.
i guess all my thoughts have gone out the window.
oh i want to watch hsm3!


toodles.

and so.

meet my new hamster.



i know.
=).

mian mian is dead.

i never want to have another hamster again.
they keep dying in my care.





my housemate knocked on my door,
and told me that she thought the hamster was dead.
i shoke the cage gently.
i shoke the cage a little harder.
i really shoke the cage.
he moved.


he was not doing well for the past few days.
he was breathing very shallowly and infrequently.
and he did not seem responsive.
when i picked him up,
he opened his eyes and squirmed a little.
he didn't kick like he always would,
he just sat in my hands,
and waited for me to put him back into the cage.


i held him and stroked him and tried to keep him awake.
i blew some air at him regularly.
me and my housemates spent the whole night trying to save him,
his final breath did not seem any different.
he just inhaled and never exhaled.







rest in peace mian mian.
love always.

within and beyond;

ohohoh



i have reached the point where i'm tired.
absolutely drained.
this is bad.
because i may have bitten off more than i can chew.



last paper tomorrow =DDDD
and it still seems as though i'm not kan cheong.
because i'm still typing away.
and i'm serious when i say that i'm not even speed typing.











two different ways to say the same thing,
two different persons to say the same thing,
it's just a couple of words strung together.
and it saddens me.

riding on a merry-go-round.

hello hello hello.



so you know how when you have absolutely nothing to do,
you look for things to do?
well,
i've loads of things to do,
yet i still look for things to do.
because i choose not to do that i have to do?




it’s called de-stressing,
not procrastinating.
really.




is it bad that i've been feeling utterly lazy?
not lazy like the normal lazy.
that is a constant for me.
as in i'm lazy to drag myself to study.
and i'm thinking if i can just do a disappearing act of sorts.
but that would be very irresponsible of me.
damn.
that means i won't be doing the disappearing act after all.
it stinks when i've a conscience. T.T






brain is mush.
no want think.
blegh.






it is not procrastination.
honest.





#edit#
my poor neck.
fell asleep on the table last night,
but it feels like the table fell asleep on me.

sunny day =).

fujiki kazue - sunny day

what spilled down
wasn’t a tear
but a praying voice.
what i looked up at
was the sun above the clouds.



it seems so exceptional
things just work out after all
it’s just another ordinary miracle today.







so i guess in a way i'm treating myself.
even when the storm hasn't passed at all.
so to speak.

重点是什么。

the weather is super good.
i listen to the rain pitter patter.
then the lightning came,
followed by thunders.
i want to sleep.
thinking whether i can fall asleep tonight,
in order to read more tomorrow
is also making me very stressful.




i'm having a headache,
sigh.
i think there's something wrong with my pillow,
lol.
my phone's mad again,
why is taylor swift singing so what by pink,
sigh.




i studied a bit,
and i cannot remember pratically everything.
i'm staring at the notes blankly.
i know it's the same drama,
i hate it.
i just need a place to drain out all this rubbish.





okla,
nite. (=
yup yup it's a terbalik smiley =)

i'm stalking.

i tend to be very obsessive.
once i focus my attention on something,
it's all i think about.
i have taken a liking to,
psych.

i've been a psych fan
the first time i saw an episode that sara gave me,
a few days ago.
the premise: cop-wanna-be pretends to be psychic to solve crimes on a consulting basis. it's mystery meets comedy meets buddy show.
but i think it's more comedy than mystery =D
hilarity does ensue.
i get so psych!!
heheh.




and the lead character,
shawn spencer.
my oh my.
how arrogant this guy seemed.
how cool he must think himself to be.
how he must think he can get a way
with his charm and cutesy gestures and grins.
but he's really funny!! =DDD
i like.




this is a as a matter of fact kind of crush.
no,
it's not a dumb giggly school girl crush.
fine maybe it is.
can it be called a crush?
i'm not too sure.
never mind,
i fancy.





Gus:
You named your fake detective agency "Psych?"
Why not just call it "Hey, We're Fooling You and the Police Department. Hope We Don't Make a Mistake and Someone Dies Because of It?"


Shawn:
First of all, Gus, that name is entirely too long; it would never fit on the window! And secondly, the best way to convince people you're not lying to them is to tell them you are!

update #1

because i couldn't think of a better title.
i have been totally out of it these days.
i forget things within a split second.
words just cruise into my left ear and out my right.
and i've been more than restless.
but i can't sleep.



i'm not feeling my best these few days.
i get the dizzy spells,
the tummy ache,
and the muscle-ache.
i need ample rest.



somehow i'm more rajin when there isn't an exam.
i don't know why.
it's like when exam is here you get that 'study later' syndrome.
then when you finally sit down you realised,
there's so damn much more to study.
then at that point,
you vowed to never procrastinate again.
but the process just keeps repeating itself.
it's just so amusing to watch.





caught up with an old friend just now.
things are same old same old.



to rinoa.
i'm not siao char bo.
and syongah is not a mangkali name.
was webcamming with her.
that girl ah,
talking to her made my blood go upstairs a bit. =P




someone is bringing me their album from korea.
thanks for the favor colin. =D
mwah mwah
have been waiting forever for this.
for me to talk about my reaction to this album,
you have to understand how i got into tvxq in the first place.
you don't wanna know?
i'm still going to tell.


it started with these variety shows 3 years ago.
ya shim man man and xman.
max was talking about watching porn,
uknow revealed he had man-boobs,
hero revealed unabashedly that he was hungry for popularity,
xiah with his dolphin voice was telling really bad jokes,
and micky was just greasy.


funny group.
but i've decided to like them. =)





okay la,
i tired already.

oh boy.

this.

is how i feel now. =)

blog later.

sshhhhhhleeeep.

p.s i love bed.

"hey, what else do you do nowadays besides studying, eating, sleeping and um, studying?"



i bet you're thinking i would answer - nothing.

WRONG.

i blog too.
heheh.



going through.
thinking through.
processiong through.


it's the songs that gets me through the day.
that,
and coffee with
a whole lot of sugar.
it's only then that i am not afraid to be up in the wee hours of the morning. it's only then i smile like there isn't a tomorrow.


i am having a headache.
i shall go rest my pretty head.
=).


to end everything,
exams are uber near.
please and thank you.



don't ask me what it's all about.
when i know,
i'll let you know.=)



nola this is not emo.

10 trillion kilometers away.

hello=).

there has been alot of unrest around and within me lately.
i have decided to set aside after giving it much thought.
you only live once so why bother with all the complicated stuff.
=).



do a tag? yes?
yes.
ok.




kita akan tau jawapannya,




*smirk smirk*...............
*wink wink*...............
*smirk somemore*






selepas ini.




and the way he says "selepas ini" will sound like seh-leh-pus-e-nay.






anyways.



1. at what age do you wish to marry?
now right now.


2. if you have the chance, what would you probably say to your beloved one?
i want you to do plastic surgery to look like tvxq. any one of them also can. can anot tarling?


3. if you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
of course not la! crazy meh?


micky wo ai ni!!


okay so maybe yes in another language so he won't understand.



5. what are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
requirements ar.
must look like micky lor what you expect.



4. if you win $1 million now, what would you do?
demolish mmu.
yes it probably won't be enough.
so thanks in advance for your kind donation.


5. which type of person do you hate the most?
i spread love only. PEACE.


6. what is the thing that will make you think he/she is bad?
nothing lar! i told you i think everybody is good!


now i'm going to die of guilt for lying...


7. if you were to be stranded on a desert island, who are the 3 blog buddies you would take with you?
may and siew mee cuz i love their their babbles and rantings.
yew cuz she has shine light in my life for 6 years. (her blog is private so it's not on the list)
rinoa cuz she's the real love of my life.



my math is still good ok.


siew mee and yew are super thin so they're considered as half of the human being.



8. do you believe you can survive without money?
no.


9. what are you afraid to lose the most?
my love for you.


10. if you can have 1 dream to come true, what would it be?
marry micky.

ei who say you cannot marry a mushroom?

i don't know what else to say already.
my mind is trying to be damn serious like dark comedy but my heart is so happy like slap-stick comedy. at the end, lame comedy is produced and we all know that is the unfunniest kind of comedy.


okay bye.






i like. =)

Download

my sunshine.

tvxq-ed once again.
the fastest and easiest way to make me happy
with all the routines i have.
watched their 1st comeback performance on sbs inkigayo.
it made me cry.
it was really really nice.
but hero was sick,
and his voice was a bit strained.
hope he gets well soon.
mirotic is erotic. :D








xiah at mbc radio station.
♥ su is sooo cute!
i want to put him in my pocket for safe-keeping.
only i can't coz he belongs to joceyn. =P









yup yup that's my mushroom micky.
purely love.





look what i've found.
the definition of fangirl:

noun.

known to rave,
squeal,
post until all hours of the night,
faint,
drool,
save excessive amouts of photos,
procrastinate,
and say "ohmygosh".
see also:

complete nutter.








the little things make me laugh.
see,
it's not hard to please me. :)
i need to chill.
it's not the end of the world.

she cried him a river.

IU - Mia

because i just love her.
this song is exceptional, displaying a hybrid pop sound with dramatic strings in the background. she joins the ranks of numerous new artists who deluged this year's kpop stage, but she truly shines amongst them all. :) and she's only 15!
download




you know what to do when you're stressed?
read stressed backward.
yes.
but my yummy-looking mini cake does not taste yummy.
it's a sad, sad day when desserts fail you.




i have too many things to do in too little time.
no joke this time.
and it all rhymes.
what the hell.
i wish i had more hands.
and time.
and brains.
mmm, brains.



it's probably because its that time of the month again.
because today i woke up,
feeling like all sense of hope is lost.
i knew this dreary friday morning was bad news,
the moment i caught a glimpse of my reflection.
the dreadfulness that usually greeted me
was replaced with a newer improved freak,
complete with dark eye circles.
i'm going insane really.
please.
just let me get over this.





oh oh have you read perez hilton?
he is officially addicted to kpop!
the most annyoying thing is this bunch of people going on the comment section pleading for some exposure to their kpop artists ...
people have some dignity, will ya?
this comment really cracks me up tho,

gaytards:
"perez, i fear for your life if you do plug tvxq and dislike their songs, as their fanbase have no social life and would commit crimes against you. they will want you DEAD! and we cannot have our favourite blogger dead now can we?! "

i'm a die-hard tvxq's fan
but sometimes the cassiopeias do get a bit out of control. :P


speaking of kpop news,
i was shocked when i found out that another korean star committed suicide. this time choi jin shil.
why are there so many cases of artist dying this year?
i just can’t stop thinking how korean entertainers are so prone to tragedy lately,
accidents,
suicides,
their everywhere.


grabbed from heechul's cy






on a lighter note,
happy belated birthday to my brother,
who claims i terrorized him from the day he was born and am the direct cause of the nervous twitch in his left eye.
he's one year younger but one time bigger than me.
so it kinda evens out. :P
lotsa lotsa love!!




love,
gimme strength.

me being plain me.

seriously plain one like white paper.







sigh.
i do realize the fact that I still own a blog.
but my life is so dull i wanna spare you the misery.



-mcd's study plan with the housemates is cancelled so i'm blogging-

so final is 14 days away, thanks to my dear calendar who counts down everyday in front of me. i shouldn't be scared because i'm already so used to it right? but yucks the world is cruel and i'm afraid of it again because what if i can't make it? i'll be like the biggest failure in the whole universe.


i've questioned my capabilities a lot lately especially since mid-term and i feel that my nightmares are coming alive to haunt me. i have all these positive affirmations plastered in my room, i really did believe in the infinite source of my capability. note- i did.



i'm constantly afraid.
afraid of whether i will succeed.
afraid of whether i am really good enough.
afraid of whether there are cockroaches in my room.



each time i feel afraid, i would hear the voice in my head telling me "DO NOT BE AFRAID" and i would continue to feel afraid. i would still do things that distract me from studying. i am a frigggin moth. i am. i get burned on one wing, and i get very angry and sit down at one corner and sulk while complaining. then i decide to flutter to candlelight again and burn my leg.



heheh i just loled at myself.
ok this is stupid.




i don't have class tomorrow =D
which means
-i can sleep as late i want to.
-i can wake up as late as i want to.
-i won't feel guilty if i'm slacking.
-i lied about not feeling guilty.





staying up while everyone sleeps,
the silence lets me think of things i don't think about.
things that i lock at the back of my mind.
maybe one day we'll live in space.
i just thought you should know.
we'll have honey stars for breakfast.
wouldn't you want to brave the black hole with me?
it'd just be us,
the stars and the universe.
no exam!












update at 0430-
it's starting to rain.
i like the rain.
if only it wasn't so heavy.
sleep,
i should go to bed,
i need to sleep,
human being sleep.
enough of the crazy rambling talk.





i'm talking to myself.
great.

i'm going MIA for a lil bit...

because i love studying.
and i'm still suffering a nervous shock
from my mid-term exam's result.
i don't know what happened.
thus the frustration.
don't ask.
i'm kinda like happy-go-lucky but sometimes not very lucky.
i shall be working very, extemely hard for the finals.
haiiiiiyakkk!


law of torts - 7th october
criminal law - 9th october
islamic law - 10th october
computer law - 16th october
malaysian studies - 17th october



one day,
i told my brother that i don't wish people good luck because i have this mindset that if you wish people good luck you'll give your luck away. thus, i only get wished and wish people all the best. the following day, before my brother sat for exam, he happily spreaded my ideology to his friends and wished his friends all the best. his friends then told him wishing people all the best is worse because you're wishing people to be the best. giving your best away what not.
the end.


so,
all the good in finals =P
yes i'm that pantang.





secret is,
i didn't know how to operate my face book account thus abandoned it...
but now i do ok!
i'm no longer the ah-po who doesn't know how to use face book.
but i think it's too mafan so i'm still abandoning it....
geez what happened to the good ol' days of friendster?
yalar... i know it's not face book but facebook.
but who really cares lar whether it's mukabuku or muka buku.
wow muka buku sounds like some exotic getaway.
or perhaps it simply sounds like muruku.
hehehehe.





i think right,
i've been going through a phase.
it's the malas mood and shitty phase.
note to self-
i should get that annoying ringing alarm clock.



i have woken up.
and i plan to never sleep again.
for there is not a point in it.
that sweet slumber shall be my last mistake tonight.
that spell is broken.


bad things comes in threes.
the forth time is a charm.
because i know a new trick you don't. =)
and i'm still mourning over my mid-term.




you know,
i think it's funny to keep a diary online.
just click this, click that,
add a couple of weird sites you go to...
and voila!
another method to announce your life into the interwebs
for million of people to see.
i will be missing you guys
since i won't be updating my blog anytime soon.
but keep your sites updated coz i'm still reading them!! =D
muaaaaxxxx!







don't forget me ar.

-missing in action-

feel good inc.

woke up early when i was back at home the other day,

and i heard this coming from the house next door.

remember when?

=)

oooo i hated going back to school.

i cringed every time i would see a back to school ad on tv.

i still cringe even now.

oh why must they torture us.

but i must admit,

i loved buying new school supplies. =)

i do think my posts consist of

imaginary pointers.

for i rarely go into details.

for details,

i think they are baggage i don't need.

you know sometimes,

when you tell people things,

and they don't reply immediately,

it's just because they aren't really interested.

a bad habit i know.

i apologize for not caring much.

geez,

how fast time flies —

i can’t believe it’s been a full year since

the previous mooncake festival.

on this auspicious sept 14,

the koreans also celebrate chuseok (korean thanksgiving).

particularly,

stars dressing up to wish people a happy holiday.

in hanboks.

no,

this is not hanbok.

and this picture is not relevant.

but it's already been uploaded.

nothing much can be done.

what can i do what can i do?

sigh.

lol =p

it's kim rae-won for

L’Oreal Men’s Expert Hydra-Energetic Turbo Booster.

a ridiculously long product name to obscure the product’s function? check!

but he seems more like the traditional type of guy’s guy to me, not someone you’d think cared a whole lot about which name-brand moisturizer to use to maintain his silky smooth complexion.

it's not too late to wish you a

right? :D

heh heh,

i'm listening to jonas brothers.

joe jonas and his bushy eyebrows is cute shit la.

moar yummy!

-after bucket loads of tears and 10000 hours of watching dramas-

eh joke lar.
how can i be emo and cry?
that previous post was like an april's fool joke.
shut up don't tell me it's september now.


so so so.
on a lighter note. :D
it's coming...

jjeng jjeng jjeng.....

tadaa!

their album.
september 24, 2008.

동. DONG


방. BANG


신. SHIN


기. KI




click to enlarge and prepare to die =P

it's my wallie now!

i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait.



although SM the company gave out nothing new in the teaser,
it still made me go ^-^ in anticipation and *fangirl's scream* for tvxq's korean comeback. it's like a countdown for me and i'm going giddy and aslfkjhasjkfh excitement rising! ♥








recent photo at kimpo airport.
must. resist. urge. to. molest... squish. chunnie.
*fail*
i want to ruffle his hair and hug him xD
he looks like a painter here for some reasons.

ok tata bye.
night.
going home tomorrow.
woohooo!!